No Pang, No Tang

No Pang, No Tang

I've been watching live telecasts of Euro 2004 on the local Thai channels; unfortunately they are broadcasted with commentaries in Thai. Found a workaround for it: BBC Radio 5 provides live commentary, which I could stream with reasonably good quality to my laptop through my apartment's broadband connection.

So last night, I turned down the volume of my TV and listened to live commentaries from BBC. Well, never mind if there's like a 1 minute delay between the Internet audio broadcast and the live pictures. At least it is better than nothing--live football is not the same without British commentary.

Euro 2004 soccer is going to be a big distraction for me. Too bad I'm also saddled with a lot of work this week. Even blogging is going to be tough. I think I will have to give many of the matches a miss.

I am also going to abstain from reading anything non-IT related for a while. Don't feel like I'm giving my optimum performance yet. Maybe it is a bit stressful and probably not mentally healthy for me to be treating work as some kind of "performance" which I have to be always at my best. But I don't have much of a choice. Not performing means I do a bad job, which directly affects my rice bowl.

Now that I'm self-employed, I cannot take things for granted. Survival is at stake here. Which was what I had expected anyway, when I decided to leave Jakarta. I wanted to feel the pang and tang of life again.

One could look at animals in the zoo as being privileged creatures--well fed and never having to worry about fighting for their own survival. But what pitiful sights they are--those pathetic creatures in their cages! They are but pale shadows of their real selves. Only in the jungle, does a lion realises its true splendour.

In the wild, everything is more intense--the scent of prey, the thrill of the hunt, the pang of fear, and the sharp tang of blood. It's good to be back.