Sunday, March 22, 2020

The Abyss of Absolution

It feels a bit 'crowded' now that everyone is forced to stay at home due to the coronavirus pandemic. The economy of the whole world is virtually grinding to a halt with all outdoor activities prohibited, except for essential services. People are just spending a lot of time on social media venting their boredom and frustrations.

I mentioned 'crowded' because of all the noise and distractions coming from social media. The whole world has converged on WhatsApp, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, spreading fear, panic and anger. This is the closest to a wartime scenario that most of our generation has ever faced.

The so-called "Movement Control Order" (MCO), as we call the partial lockdown here, is a great pain and inconvenience to a lot of people. We are not allowed to go for their usual activities at the mamak stall, parks, shopping malls and pubs--which is how the majority of people spend their leisure time. We are being forced to stay at home and overcome our restlessness.

It is a good time for us to finally learn the nature of our minds. We are in constant need of distractions to prevent our internal emptiness from coming to the surface. But once we are tired of fiddling with our smartphones and channel-surfing the TV, we have to confront our own minds. But why are we so afraid of it?

We realize that our so-called 'happy life' is simply the swift flitting of the mind from one distraction to another. And once this sequence of stimuli ends, we are left staring into the deep and dark abyss within. It is like a an empty stage, after the play has ended and the audience have all gone home and we realize that all the ups and downs of emotions we face in our daily lives, are all fake and ephemeral.

Now what is in this abyss? If we know how to make friends with it, it is actually a wellspring of insights. By overcoming our fear of solitude and silence, we gain communion with something deeper within us. What seemed like an endless vortex of darkness sudden springs to life as a fount of creativity--like diving into a black hole only to emerge on the other side, in another universe of light.

There's so much we could discover within ourselves, if only we are willing to let go of the seductions of the external world. Then we'll understand what the mystics and artists have been trying to tell us all this while. Our absolution can only be found at the bottom of the abyss.